Make Your Meetings a Safe Space for Honest Conversation
I recently met with a group of managers to discuss ways to improve meetings. Our goal was to figure out how to create a space that people actually look forward to being in. We each began by describing a meeting we remembered as especially powerful.
One story stood out.
My colleague told us about a time when he was a young engineer working on several project teams in a manufacturing facility. He said, “Josh, my manager, would take everyone out for pizza when he came to the factory, and we’d have a ‘no secrets’ meeting. Josh asked us about whatever he wanted to know and we did the same in return. It was a meeting where everyone had permission to say or ask anything. It was amazing.”
Josh used these meetings to discover how his team was doing, how their projects were progressing, and what they needed in terms of support and resources. He asked broad questions to initiate open conversation:
- What do you think I need to know?
- Where are you struggling?
- What are you proud of?
There was no pressure to have a perfect answer. The only requirement was to be honest and sincere. Of course, it helped that Josh was a thoughtful, authentic, and caring manager — qualities needed to create the psychological safety such a conversation requires.
The quest for better meetings ultimately lies in leading with mutual respectful, inclusivity, and establishing a space that is safe enough for people to speak their minds. You may not need to do exactly what Josh did, but you can increase the freedom, candor, and quality of conversation in your own meetings by focusing on two key areas: giving permission and creating safety.
Let’s start with permission.
Permission to say or ask anything is priceless. It allows us to fully express ourselves: to seek what we want, to give feedback, to speak up about issues when we find the need. By announcing that he would like to have a “no secrets” meeting, Josh was giving his team permission to display a level of candor that isn’t reached in most settings. He asked those who spoke not to hold back or edit their thoughts. He asked those who listened to give their peers a chance to be fully heard, which is what we all want — to say exactly what we are thinking and be respected for saying it.
In your own meetings, talk about permission up front — it’s best to address it directly rather than assume it’s already there. What permission would you like from the group so that you can lead effectively? What permission does the group need from you to successfully participate?
As a leader, ask your team permission to:
- keep the conversation on track when it diverges or gets repetitive
- call on people who have not yet spoken
- hold people back if they are dominating the conversation
- ask clarifying questions when you need someone to elaborate
Empower your team by reminding them that they have permission to:
- ask questions at any time
- invite colleagues into the conversation if they have not spoken
- ask to spend extra time on a topic
- ask other people to say more about where they stand on an issue
- express concerns that haven’t been fully addressed
Finally, encourage your team (and yourself) to ask permission before making a comment. It will help ensure that your comments are non-threatening and received thoughtfully. Before speaking out, say:
- May I ask you something?
- May I tell you something?
- May I give you some coaching?
- May I push back a bit on what you are saying?
If that feels like too much to remember, the main takeaway is: You and your team have a right to ask for whatever you need to be effective in a meeting — to lead for results, to fully express yourselves, and to add value to the discussion.
Now, let’s focus on safety.
The degree to which a person feels safe in a meeting setting is largely based on their previous experiences. Many of us have — at one point or another — experienced feeling as if we were not heard or appreciated when we spoke up. But when people feel their comments will be listened to and treated with respect, they are more likely to be vulnerable and say exactly what they are thinking. Conversations become broader and deeper when everyone is involved and feels safe enough to speak their minds. To create psychological safety during a meeting:
- ask the group to devote their full attention to each person who speaks (do this at the start of the meeting)
- allow each person to take their time and complete their thoughts
- ask follow-up questions for clarity if necessary
- share what is valuable about someone’s question or comment
- use people’s names and refer back to earlier comments they’ve made
- invite people into the conversation who have not spoken
- answer any and all questions truthfully
- summarize what you learned as the meeting comes to an end
- explain what actions you will take to put those insights to use and ask your team for their suggestions as well
- acknowledge the quality of the conversation and thank the group for it
After the meeting, follow up by:
- completing the action items by the deadlines you set
- not sharing the conversation with others without permission
- sending written thank you notes to participants (when appropriate)
- following up with people to ensure their comments were addressed to their satisfaction
People don’t just want to belong, they want to contribute. You can give your team the opportunity to do so by applying the above principles. In the process of having more candid, mutually respectful conversations, your team will become more cohesive and able to work together more powerfully. They may even begin to look forward to your meetings because of the remarkable conversations that permission and safety create. And better still, you may even start to look forward to leading those meetings.
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What It Takes To Be A Great Employee: The Parable Of The Oranges Being a great employee pays off with better positions, higher pay, and..
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Apr 25, 2019Your first Job
10 Essential Strategies To Succeed In Your First Job Congratulations, graduate! After the exhausting and stressful process of finishing school, searching for and landing your..
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Apr 12, 2019How To Escape Procrastination
How To Escape The Procrastination Doom Loop When you imagine a highly productive person, you likely think of someone who focuses effortlessly on the job..
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Apr 5, 2019Exceptional Employees
8 Clues That a Candidate Will be an Exceptional Employee Over the past 40 years, I have reviewed at least 30,000 resumes and LinkedIn profiles..
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Mar 22, 2019Increase Employee Retention
4 Smart Ways to Increase Employee Retention Keeping your employees once you have them is a thorny problem in the staffing services industry. The difficulty..
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Mar 15, 2019Things Happen!
Here's How To Recover From A Career Setback Whether you’ve botched an interview question, cancelled an important meeting last-minute or missed a typo in an..
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Feb 22, 2019How to Assess Transferable…
How do you make sure you don’t lose out on those candidates who bring additional talents, interests, and unusual experiences that can be a real..
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Feb 15, 2019Workplace Diversity
In an 8-Minute Animated Film, Pixar Just Captured Why Companies Still Struggle With Workplace Diversity Yes, it's a movie about a pink ball of yarn--but..
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Feb 1, 2019Your Social Media Profile
Here’s what recruiters look for on a candidate’s social media profile Maintaining the right balance between being professional and being yourself on social media can..
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Jan 25, 2019Effective Job Interview
How to conduct an effective job interview As the employment market improves and candidates have more options, hiring the right person for the job has..
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Jan 18, 2019Things You Should Never…
14 Things You Should Never, Ever Say In A Job Interview It’s always intimidating to interview for a new job, whether you’re fresh out of..
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Jan 11, 2019Reasons for Leaving?
How To Answer Why You Left (Or Want to Leave) Your Employer If you want the job, don't reveal this. Job interviews are designed to..
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Jan 4, 2019A good LinkedIn Summary
Here's how to write a LinkedIn summary that could help you land your dream job, according to a marketing director at LinkedIn You might approach..
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Dec 14, 2018Stay Focused Through the…
14 Ways to Stay Focused at Work Through the Holidays We’re in the midst of the holiday season, and as you try to juggle parties,..
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Dec 7, 2018Great Employees Leave Great…
Why Great Employees Leave “Great Cultures” “We have a great culture.” We have all heard it. We have all said it. But what does that..
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Nov 30, 2018On-the-Job Training
Young Workers No Longer Get the On-the-Job Training They Need -- So They're Finding It Elsewhere With companies training people less, the most valuable path..
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Nov 23, 2018Help Your New Hires…
3 Ways You Can Help Your New Hires to Succeed Filling a vacant position is expensive, and unless you do these three things, it's liable..
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Nov 15, 2018A Successful Meeting
Three Ways To Prevent Someone From Stealing Your Spotlight In A Meeting We've all been there at one point or another. You're in a meeting,..
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Nov 9, 2018‘Bad’ Interviewee
That 'Bad' Interviewee You Just Talked to May Be the Perfect Match for Your Job Opening The 'pattern matching' that companies have long used to..
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Nov 2, 2018When should managers overlook…
Why managers should overlook results in these situations By focusing on culture and people first, you can set your team up for success in the..
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Oct 26, 2018Recruitment in Cyprus
Recruitment in Cyprus - Thoughts and Ideas from Advance Career Team Read the detailed interview published on TopJobsCyprus website and share your comments and ideas!..
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Oct 12, 2018Integrators VS Segmentors
Are your employees integrators or segmentors? An organization has both integrators and segmentors. Being a segmentor is a tough ask. If you choose to be..
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Oct 5, 2018Help Your Team Members…
Help Your Team Members Succeed (Especially When They're Tempted to Leave) Help that valued employee being lured by another opportunity think through what they are..
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Sep 28, 2018Avoid Toxic Team Members
Are You Hiring a 'Team' Player -- or Someone Just Looking out for No. 1? How can leaders make sure they're not unwittingly inviting a..
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Sep 14, 2018Update Your Resume
Updating Your Résumé Might Mean Updating Yourself It seems like a total no-brainer: you should update your résumé and online profiles when you are job..
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Sep 7, 2018Tap Into Your Motivation!
Putting Yourself In Drive: How To Tap Into Your Motivation The one common component in every great success story is motivation: an ever-elusive elixir that..
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Aug 31, 2018Enhancing your job search
How To Bounce Back When The Job Search Gets You Down With a dream job in mind, an updated résumé in hand and responses to..
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Aug 17, 2018Social media can cost…
When 'What Happens In Vegas' Ends Up In Your Job Search What happens in Vegas really doesn’t stay there. That “funny” picture about that..
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Aug 3, 2018Emotional Intelligence at Workplace
How To Develop More Emotionally Intelligent Employees In the quest to develop leaders who will foster a culture of equity and inclusion in the workplace,..
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Jul 20, 2018Rewarding Employees Wisely
5 Ways to Reward Employees When Raises Aren't an Option Many workers are doing double duty these days because employers either can’t afford to hire..
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Jul 6, 2018Hiring the right people?
5 Steps to Hiring the Right People for Your Business "Hire slow, fire fast" is great advice, but it's not always easy to follow. The..
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Jun 29, 2018Ready for Entrepreneurial Success?
4 Entry-Level Jobs That Will Prep You for Entrepreneurial Success Success is a journey, not a destination, so think hard about where to start. Entrepreneurship..
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Jun 15, 2018Experience or Talent?
When to Hire Raw Talent vs. Job Experience Experience is a must for some jobs, but people with raw talent offer unique benefits. You have..
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Jun 8, 2018Back On Track
How to get back on track when you’re having an unproductive day A rocky start shouldn’t dictate your entire workday. Do these things to reverse..
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Jun 1, 2018Value of Office Communication
Why Office Communication is Highly Valued and Often Ignored A huge number of employees don't trust their bosses, and it's not hard to figure out..
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May 25, 2018Impacts of High Turnover
The Negative Impacts of a High Turnover Rate High turnover rates can negatively affect a company and its employees in many ways. With the constant..
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May 18, 2018General Data Protection Regulation
Five Final Checks To Ensure GDPR Compliance It is just one week until the EU update to General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR) compliance deadline of..
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May 11, 2018Employee Onboarding Strategies
Seven New Onboarding Strategies You'll See This Year According to a study from Equifax, more than half of all employees who left their job in..
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May 4, 2018Strategic Workforce Tools
Your Workforce Tools Are More Strategic Than You Might Think This is not a typical article about attracting talented job candidates or retention — while..
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Apr 27, 2018AI empowers HR
AI will make HR more Human, Strategic and Innovated Artificial intelligence (AI) is a source of both huge excitement and fear across the HR function...
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Apr 20, 2018Engagement Strategy
Don’t Let ‘Meaning’ Be Missing From Your Engagement Strategy Meaning is one of the five keys in building employee engagement and it may be the..
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Apr 13, 2018Negative performance feedback
Is giving negative performance feedback really negative? Negative performance feedback is a difficult topic to talk about. Does it help the performance? This feature throws..
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Mar 30, 2018Inspire Change In Your…
4 Ways To Inspire Change In Your Employees Have you ever listened to a speech that inspired you so much, you were ready to make..
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Mar 23, 2018Employees Feel and Act…
7 Ways to Incent Employees to Feel and Act as Owners Building accountability into your business culture is a leadership process. It can't be driven..
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Mar 16, 2018Don’t Shuffle People Into…
Don't Shuffle People Into the Wrong Job Just Because They're Already on the Payroll You grow your company by putting proven performers where you need..
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Mar 9, 2018The Best Internal Candidate…
Why the Best Internal Candidate Might Be from an Unlikely Part of the Company Nearly a decade since Gallup released its bible, Strengths-Based Leadership, which..
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Feb 26, 2018Minimise Workplace Negativity
Tips for Minimizing Workplace Negativity To Deal with Negativity in the Workplace, Use These 9 Tips Nothing affects employee morale more insidiously than persistent workplace..
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Feb 16, 2018Fail at Switching Jobs?
This Is the No. 1 Reason Why People Fail at Switching Jobs (and What to Do About It) There's a reason changing careers is so..
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Feb 2, 2018A Technique To Get…
Didn't Get Your Dream Job? This 1 Technique Could Get You a Second Chance Every job seeker experiences this at least once, if not several..
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Jan 26, 2018
Prepare new employees for…
The Best Way to Set New Employees Up for Success Create an onboarding program that's both meaningful and memorable Congratulations; you've just hired a terrific..
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Jan 19, 2018First Hour, Day, Week,…
Do This In Your First Hour, Day, Week, And Month Of Your New Job Getting settled into your new job is the ultimate act of..
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Jan 5, 20187 Ways Modest Leadership…
7 Ways Modest Leadership Increases Team Success When we imagine the traits of successful leaders, whether they are managers, high level executives, CEO's or owners..
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Dec 29, 2017Grateful Workplaces and Engaged…
Grateful Workplaces and Engaged Employees All leaders need to ask themselves why happy and engaged employees are worth their weight in gold. If you’re a..
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Dec 15, 2017Employee stress during Christmas
Managing employee stress during the festive period More than half of employees feel stressed in the weeks leading up to Christmas, with most calling for..
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Dec 8, 2017HR in 2022
What's HR going to be in 2022? A Study sheds some light... A recent study shows us a glimpse of what HR might look like..
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Dec 1, 2017Appreciating your employees
How to Avoid the No. 1 Reason People Leave Their Jobs William James, the father of psychology, stated that the most fundamental psychological need is..
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Nov 24, 2017HR Function in 2024
Will You Be Leading an HR Function in 2024? Here are five things to look at to examine and determine if you’ve got what it..
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Nov 17, 2017Employee Appraisals
Importance of Effective Employee Appraisals The performance appraisal may be one of the few times during the year where an employee and the reviewer, typically..
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Oct 20, 2017Employees don’t see link…
Employees don't see link between pay and performance Employers gave themselves only mediocre ratings on pay programme effectiveness. Employees are struggling to see the link..
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Sep 22, 2017Workplaces still hamper productivity
Workplaces still hamper productivity Noise, lack of privacy and space are some of the factors causing the greatest dissatisfaction among office workers Nearly half of..
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Sep 15, 2017Lost your Job?
Nine Things You Should and Shouldn't Do If You Lose Your Job Most of us wouldn’t think to associate the words "joblessness" and "fun," but..
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Aug 16, 2017Write your first CV
It's all about potential: how to write a CV with no work experience Follow these tips to stand out among competing candidates – from research..
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Aug 4, 2017Is it time to…
The Best Ways to Reward Employees. Having an effective reward program in place can help solve many of your HR issues. Every company needs a..
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Jul 28, 2017Burnout: exhausted or lonely?
Burnout at Work Isn’t Just About Exhaustion. It’s Also About Loneliness More and more people are feeling tired and lonely at work. In analyzing the..
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Jul 21, 2017People don’t take HR…
People Don’t Take HR Seriously; Here’s Why That’s Dangerous Legacy beliefs like being the bad guy and a lack of strategic vision isolates HR, and..
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Jun 30, 2017Career Development
Think Strategically About Your Career Development In a world where the average employee sends and receives 122 emails per day and attends an average of..
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Jun 16, 2017Diversity and Inclusion
Diversity Doesn’t Stick Without Inclusion Leaders have long recognized that a diverse workforce of women, people of color, and LGBT individuals confers a competitive edge..
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Jun 2, 2017Advance Your Career
How To Advance Your Career In A Crappy Entry-Level Job Yes, you can still bring yourself one step closer to snagging that dream job even..
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May 2, 2017Employee Burnout
What causes burnout and how it can affect both the employees and the organisation How HR Can Help Prevent Employee Burnout An engaged workforce. It's..